Chocolate Charlie wears a tire on his head. Runs away from his own excrement….
So this week, I’m staying with Chocolate Charlie, who’s quite a character. He’s some kind of Springer Spaniel, retriever mix I think. Part Dog, Part Monkey. The other night it rained and he tried to cram himself under the bed, which he’s really too big to fit under. So I’m watching some crap TV and I hear the thunder rumble outside and then scuffle, thump, scuffle as he army crawls into his bomb shelter for safety. When it stops thundering it’s scuffle, thump, scuffle as he comes out again. He grabs his tire toy which is ridiculous and bigger than his head and comes over to me with the black rubber donut on his face. God I love these creatures!
Last night I went to my friend Melissa’s reading series Mixer at the Cake Shop on the Lower East Side. I love the Cake Shop, Andy, the owner is super nice. I played there a lot back when I was in bands. In fact when my band Wu Wei played our first show there with the Old Haunts it was kinda crazy. I was all excited because Tobi Vail from Bikini Kill was playing drums with them. I got urinary tract infection the day of the show but didn’t want to miss it. Let me clarify here for those who don’t know, Urinary Tract Infections are not only painful like you are being stabbed in the vagina with a sharp knife, but also can make you lose bladder control. You have to treat them with antibiotics, so you have to go to the doctor, I swear if more men got UTI’s you’d be able to get an over-the -counter cure. Anyways, I went out and bought some Depends and played the show with a diaper on. How punk rock is that? I digress…
So at Mixer we ate red velvet cake and watched Anne Hayes of the lit mag Storyscape read a funny story about a fictional literary agency. I clapped even though they rejected my poems, not that I’m bitter. Suzanne Guillette read from her book Much to Your Chagrin: A Memoir of Embarrassment. She read a story about a hungover guy having to get home on the subway in Barcelona wearing only a white t-shirt and a pink speedo. Then Sini Anderson of the mythical Sister Spit freestyled a story with musical accompaniment. Sini is a good friend and an amazing performer. You just have to go see her to understand. When she tells a story it is an engrossing, etherial experience. Last night it was mostly about her crazy childhood and Michael Jackson. We headed home before the band, Falling of the Bright, played (Sorry!), had to catch the B train before it stopped running at 9pm and see the season Premier of Top Chef!
That’s all for now. Gotta go work on Chocolate Charlie’s poem and then get melted walking dogs in 90 degree weather!