Giving up Ego for the Holidays

Dog Nativity pic borrowed from Tamara Dormer's facebook profile : )

Happy Holidays everyone! I can’t believe it has been two months since I last blogged but a lot has been going on. I guess I’ll just start where I left off at Best Friends Animal Sanctuary in Utah. Despite it being an amazing learning experience and forming great relationships with the other trainers and the dogs out there they didn’t choose me for a Dog Trainer position. I am really disappointed on a professional level, but on a personal level I feel relieved. I would’ve loved to work with the amazing people at best friends but my fiance wouldn’t have been able to move out there for a while, if at all- there aren’t exactly a ton of archiving jobs in the middle of Utah. I hope to be doing some work with them locally with their Community Training Partners Program and have kept in touch with the trainers Pat, Jen, and Tamara since I got back to New York. It’s tough on the old ego but I think it’s for the best. Looks like the dogs I worked with are continuing to make progress. I spoke to pat the other day on the phone and he said Sir Uno is running around like a puppy playing which is huge. There’s some footage here. Firefly has continued to make progress with her dedicated caregivers/ trainers and was adopted! More here. So the good work is still being done and I’m getting to do work locally helping out with Pets for Life/ Safety Net Program and volunteering regularly at Sean Casey Animal Rescue in addition to training pet dogs in Brooklyn.

A week after I returned to Brooklyn I moved in with my fiance. Perhaps the old Higher Power knows what he’s doing. Had I gotten the job in Utah I would’ve had to postpone moving in and getting married and those are two things I’m glad I didn’t have to give up. They say “Rejection is God’s Protection” and perhaps our relationship wouldn’t have weathered the whole Utah Brooklyn separation well. Moving in has been great but its also been a trip since both of us have lived alone for the past ten years. So far we and the cats are getting along with minimal hissing. We’re starting to plan our wedding for Memorial Day weekend 2011. Hopefully also with minimal hissing.

On the writing front I’ve decided to stop blogging for BOMB after a year and a half to focus on my own writing, getting married, and doing more work with animal shelters. I love poetry and writing but ultimately my priorities are spiritual- the relationships in my life and being of service to the community with my skills. Creativity is important but at the end of my days I think I’ll be more concerned with how much I loved and helped people and not how much I published. I think the publishing thing is just ego. Ultimately it’s the being creative that makes me feel good, publishing anything only gives short term satisfaction.

Its funny how I let my ideas of what I think my life should be or look like effect my happiness in life. My life looks nothing like what I thought it would years or even months ago. When I can let go of my ego and ideas and accept that maybe I don’t know what will ultimately give me lasting satisfaction and be grateful and accepting of the blessings that I have today, only then can I really be happy.

Phoebe photo by Dennis Riley

For today I’m grateful¬†that:

I get to have a sleepover party with my pal Phoebe.

I have awesome people and animals in my life and we’re all healthy.

I took Christmas weekend off work and am going to see Peewee Herman on Broadway.

It really doesn’t get much better than that!

Happy Holidays!

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Filed under dog training, Dogs, God, Spirituality, Writing

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